It's raining today. I normally like the rain but today it's wearing on me. Can't deny it fits my mood, however. I'm in a worrying mood. A brooding mood. A pouting mood.
My day started out early with a doctor's appointment. Figured I might as well get the whole gamut of tests, as I haven't been to the doctor in years. Literally, years. I can't help but admit I am scared. I'm scared so many of my peers are getting seriously ill. I'm scared I don't take strict precaution in my love life. I'm scared of bad news.
Also weighing heavy on my heart is the idea of leaving Oregon. I have been in serious talks with a recruiter in Denver. While the idea of making a reliable income again is so tempting, I have my reservations. Of course I love my friends and family in Oregon. But, on the other hand, I never left. I feel it may be time to do so. It scares me to death - the thought of being on my own - starting completely anew. But also, it sounds refreshing. A new start, a new job, a new group of men, and friends. This could either turn out wonderfully or awfully.
I know I am complaining today...I just feel like I am so close to something happening. And I am so READY for something, anything to happen.
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